This has been some kind of week.
Motherhood, mothering, the love of a mother, a mother's joy, a mother's loss, a mother's pain, a mother's acceptance. . . .a mother's tears. . . .
My husband's grandmother passed away on Sunday. The family is grieving, but she was ready to see our Saviour face-to-face.
My mother-in-law is heart-broken . . .her Mommy gone, there with her when she drew her last breath.
Grandma was Mama to 9 children, and had a great number of grandchildren and great-grandchildren. The matriarch. . .great memories, not-so-good memories, laughter, tears, time spent, giving, sharing . . .
Then, on Tuesday I found out that someone dear to me miscarried. I know what she's facing. That pain can bubble up from no where, seemingly out of the blue, even when you thought you were past it.
She has a strong faith in our God. Her words: "The part that makes this the most difficult is not knowing why, but I know not knowing is a part of God's plan for me in trusting Him." Determined to trust the One who knows, realizing He is more than capable of working things out.
A mother's prayers, a mother's faith, a mother's heart, a mother's need for God . . .
So I'm weighing it all, praying. Knowing the loss of a grandmother--twice, knowing the loss of a baby without all of the answers. . .
And here I sit, in the midst of it all, while life kicks and stretches and pulls and turns in my womb . . . contractions here and there. . .wondering so many things.
Mixed emotions: pain, joy, anticipation, sadness, uneasiness, lots of prayer, sleepless nights, wonder, amazement, more prayer, in awe of motherhood and all it brings.
and comfort us in
no matter how