Do I Need a Break?

In my eight and a half years of mothering my children, there are those who look at me with a self-created pity and a false empathy. . .

Your husband should be doing more, so you can have some "me time."

When I was a young mother, I sent my children to their grandmother's every weekend so I could have time to do this and that.

She doesn't send her children here or there; they don't even go to the church nursery!

Won't you be happy when your youngest goes to school so you can have the house to yourself?

You poor mother of small children; you have your hands full. You must need a break!

I realize that the ways in which we parent our children are different. There isn't anything wrong with a weekend at grandma's or a visit to the church nursery. There's nothing wrong with a hobby or special interest. There's nothing wrong with times of rest throughout the week to maintain energy and a clear focus. 

However, I reject the notion that if I choose my children over other interests then I must be absurd. It bothers me when people look at me through a foggy glass, one that is clouded with the notion that because they may be "tired" of their children, that I must be, too; clouded with the ideals of the world that tell us children are in the way, so cast them aside; clouded with a message that we, as mothers have too much on our plates, so find a way to escape from family life.

Please don't assume that because what I do in my household may look like a lot that it automatically means that I am disgruntled, unhappy, upset, bound, tired, or overwhelmed. No, of course everyday isn't perfect--I'm not perfect (shocker!). Of course I have moments of frustration, of course there are times when I struggle--BIG TIME. However, I am accepting the gifts God gives me in my children. I am committed to my role as wife and mom. I count it as a calling, a freedom choice, a blessing, one that I thank God for every. single. day. I am not looking for ways to be rid of my children.

First of all, I actually like my children. Yes, I love them; I cannot imagine not loving them. But I actually LIKE them. They are my little treasures, my little bowls of joy, and I'd even say that they're my friends. They teach me, they make me laugh and I genuinely like being in their company.

Next, I am learning and growing in my faith. And one thing the Lord is showing me is all the ways and opportunities I have to serve Him by serving and raising my children. Being a mother is one of the most humbling experiences ever, in life and it seems to be more and more humbling as my children grow older. I have learned so many things about myself, through my children, that need the SpotLight of Truth shined directly on them, nice and bright, so that I can repent of that ugliness and be forgiven. My children bring me closer to Him.

Finally, I realize that if God says the same, we live our lives longer as adults than we do as children. Being a child is a priceless point in time, one that is so fragile and delicate. A point in time that must be handled with precision and care. With that being said, time is of the essence! Having more "me time" pales in comparison to how little time I have before my children are all grown up. I am okay with the sacrifices I make now because I am confident in the Lord, and the fruit He will yield in future generations.

Quite simply, ladies. . .it's not about me. . . it is about Him and all the ways I can serve Him well. One way I serve Him is through the children that He has so graciously given to me. Thank you, Lord, for your gifts.

Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
-Psalm 127:3

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  1. This is so beautiful and wise. What a lovely, lovely heart dedicated to bringing Him Glory! I adore you, dear Stacie! I love how you boldly declare the Truth in Love! May He continue to bless your precious family. They are truly blessed to have such a one as you at the center of the home, serving Him by serving them. :)

  2. Amen! I like being in the company of my children as well-- so much so that "I just want to be with them" is one of my biggest reasons for choosing to homeschool. It saddens me that others don't understand that and think it strange.

  3. Oh, Anne,

    You are so very sweet. Thank you for your friendship and the wisdom I've gleaned from your blog.

    May God bless you and your family as well.

  4. Hi April,

    "I just want to be with them" is such an accurate quote for my feelings about my kiddos, as well. They are lovely little people, quirks and all.

    Take care.

  5. Stacie,
    Children are gifts from God. I learned that while carrying you. Enjoy our beautiful grand children to the fullest. It will seem as though they were born yesterday when they are grown up and living their own lives. I thank God for you and your brother and the beautiful children we have gained through you and my lovely SON (in law)! :) I am so proud to have been blessed to have you as my daughter!!! :)

    I love YOU,

  6. Hey Mom,

    Thanks for all the love!! :)

    It already seems like they were "born yesterday" and they're not even grown yet. . . as you know, it goes by too quickly.

    I love you, Mom!!!!!!!
    Hugs and kisses,

  7. Amen! Amen! Amen! Well said!
    You're children are cutie pies :)
    Did I say AMEN! :)

  8. Amen, Kristin! LOL

    Thanks for your sweet words about my babes.

  9. Oh Stacie! Amen and amen again! This testimony was so beautiful and heart-felt. It's so wonderful to read/know about mother's who actually LOVE their children! Your children are SO adorable! I just want to give them a big squeezy hug! :)

  10. Madame Wildflower,

    Thank you for such kind words; it means a lot to me.

    A "big squeezy hug" is so sweet! :)

    Take care.

  11. What a blessing finding your blog tonight has been to me. I will regularly visit now that I've found you!

    You are so right - I hear on a regular basis many (if not all) of the comments you listed. I try not to be offended by those who belittle my desire to be with my children. I am convinced that my 3 boys are my ministry. There may be other things that my Lord has for me to do but right now, right here, it is raising these children and being my husband's helpmeet.

    Thank you for giving voice to my own feelings as well.

  12. I agree with "I Live in an Antbed"... "I love how you boldly declare the Truth in Love!" That's what admire about you Stacie, you "declare the truth in love" Our children teach us sooo much. We are blessed to be able to have a stay at home ministry!!

    You are a living example of a Proverbs 31 Woman!! I pray God continues to bless you, your children, and your family(:

    Take care lady!!

  13. Thank you. Thank you very much! I want to say this all the time, but I have so many friends and family who think I should want to get away that I don't -- I just don't know how as well as you did here. I *love* the life God has given me. Yes, I get tired. Yes, it can be overwhelming. But the fact is that when I am not with my kids, I miss them like crazy! God made me to be a mom, and I revel in motherhood :)

  14. Hi Cyndi,

    Thanks so much for joining me here and for your kind words. I agree with you; right now, in this season of my life, my main ministry is to my husband and my children.

    I appreciate your comment so much.
    Take care.

  15. Oh, Gertha! My sweet, sweet friend.

    Thank you so much for your encouragement--it really means a lot. You are so right--my children have taught me so many things about myself that I'm sure I wouldn't have learned if it weren't for them.

    Thank you for your prayers and I will continue to pray the same for you and yours.

    Talk to you soon!!

  16. Hi Lisa Grace,

    Thank you for stopping by and for sharing your thoughts.

    I feel the same way about my children. As you said,
    "God made me a mom," so why wouldn't we be happy with such a gift, right?? It is a true blessing from Him and I'm so grateful to receive it.

    Take care and don't be discouraged!! :)


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