Do I Need a Break?
In my eight and a half years of mothering my children, there are those who look at me with a self-created pity and a false empathy. . .
Your husband should be doing more, so you can have some "me time."
When I was a young mother, I sent my children to their grandmother's every weekend so I could have time to do this and that.
She doesn't send her children here or there; they don't even go to the church nursery!
Won't you be happy when your youngest goes to school so you can have the house to yourself?
You poor mother of small children; you have your hands full. You must need a break!
However, I reject the notion that if I choose my children over other interests then I must be absurd. It bothers me when people look at me through a foggy glass, one that is clouded with the notion that because they may be "tired" of their children, that I must be, too; clouded with the ideals of the world that tell us children are in the way, so cast them aside; clouded with a message that we, as mothers have too much on our plates, so find a way to escape from family life.
Please don't assume that because what I do in my household may look like a lot that it automatically means that I am disgruntled, unhappy, upset, bound, tired, or overwhelmed. No, of course everyday isn't perfect--I'm not perfect (shocker!). Of course I have moments of frustration, of course there are times when I struggle--BIG TIME. However, I am accepting the gifts God gives me in my children. I am committed to my role as wife and mom. I count it as a calling, a freedom choice, a blessing, one that I thank God for every. single. day. I am not looking for ways to be rid of my children.
First of all, I actually like my children. Yes, I love them; I cannot imagine not loving them. But I actually LIKE them. They are my little treasures, my little bowls of joy, and I'd even say that they're my friends. They teach me, they make me laugh and I genuinely like being in their company.
Next, I am learning and growing in my faith. And one thing the Lord is showing me is all the ways and opportunities I have to serve Him by serving and raising my children. Being a mother is one of the most humbling experiences ever, in life and it seems to be more and more humbling as my children grow older. I have learned so many things about myself, through my children, that need the SpotLight of Truth shined directly on them, nice and bright, so that I can repent of that ugliness and be forgiven. My children bring me closer to Him.
Finally, I realize that if God says the same, we live our lives longer as adults than we do as children. Being a child is a priceless point in time, one that is so fragile and delicate. A point in time that must be handled with precision and care. With that being said, time is of the essence! Having more "me time" pales in comparison to how little time I have before my children are all grown up. I am okay with the sacrifices I make now because I am confident in the Lord, and the fruit He will yield in future generations.
Quite simply, ladies. . .it's not about me. . . it is about Him and all the ways I can serve Him well. One way I serve Him is through the children that He has so graciously given to me. Thank you, Lord, for your gifts.
The fruit of the womb is a reward.